Barbie Perkins-Cooper, Author

Tag: faith

  • Losing Weight — the Weight Watchers Way!


    Dearest Readers:

    If you are a regular follower of my blog, you are familiar with the saga I write and share about losing weight. I confess, I’ve had difficulty with weight gains, weight losses, all of my life. Now that I am an active and regular member of Weight Watchers, I truly believe I have finally found the key, motivation and determination to achieve my weight goal. No, I haven’t established a goal — yet, but as the pounds (and lots of inches) are finally decreasing now, I have a possible goal in mind. Someday in the near future, I will meet with my leader, to confirm that goal.

    Today is Monday. My regular weigh in day is Thursday. Last Thursday I was a bit too tired to go to the meeting. This week, I will face the music, regardless how tired I am. Last night was another night of no sleep; however, it wasn’t due to my ‘circular thinking,’ but a lack of comfort in my home. When we went to bed last night, I checked the thermostat, discovering it was a bit hot in our home — 75 degrees. I tossed and turned, unable to sleep, I rose from the bed, strolled around the house a bit, noticing the thermostat read 77 degrees. We have our thermostat set at 71, so I was a bit suspicious. Rushing with thoughts of my household budget, I prayed that if something was wrong with our air conditioner, I had to be prepared to ‘juggle the budget’ once again. My husband is on furlough now on certain days of the week, cutting into our income. Thanks so much, Congress! No, I don’t blame Congress completely for my having to juggle a budget, but at least I am confident that I can make a decision. Congress — well, we all know they are members of the “Good Ole Boys” club and cannot have the courage to make a decision. As for the women in Congress, they are a bit outnumbered, so I’m certain their voices are not heard by those imbecile Good Ole Boys!

    But, the discussion about Congress is for another time! Last night was a total lack of sleep, so at 3:45am I phoned our heating and air company. The temp in the house was steadily climbing — now 78 degrees. My chest was wheezing, my skin damp to the touch, and the fan in the room was a bit dusty, needing a good cleaning. Asthmatics have a dreadful time cleaning fans. The service technician arrived early this morning, just a few minutes before 9am. I was prepared to have an additional expense, so I sat in the kitchen, drinking coffee while Phil worked with the tech. We were lucky this time. The $84.00 service charge to come out to check our unit would be covered under the extended warranty since our unit is only eight years old. The capacitor was bad, so the tech replaced it, had us sign an invoice and presented us with a $0.00 fee! Thank you, God. Still, it is hot in the house – last check, the thermostat read 76 degrees. At least the air is circulating now and I can breathe better, along with my precious pups.

    Mondays are usually my scheduled day to do extensive household cleaning, the usual weekly vacuuming, dusting, scrubbing floors, bathrooms, etc. Today, I have managed to talk myself out of this work, and I’ve talked myself out of jumping on the treadmill. I am simply too exhausted to “Move” today. This got me thinking — how do we cope when life gives us lemons, makes us depressed, and manages to convince us that ‘today will be a slow day?’

    Last week, I exercised every day. Weeks, or perhaps months ago, when I started using the treadmill and other exercise equipment I have at home, my goal was to do fifty side bends, fifty ab crunches, and ten minutes on the treadmill. Energized, I increased all and can now do the treadmill at a faster rate for thirty, sometimes forty minutes. Today, there is no way, but I will find my motivation again. I am getting so many compliments now and that is truly my motivation. I have a goal to reach, and with the will of myself and the strength I get from God, I will achieve this goal.

    Today, I’ve decided I must take baby steps again. Even though it has been a stressful day, I am sticking to the plan, just not the moving aspect of it. Oh well. Better days are ahead!

    Today, it is my turn to share with all of you this simple statement — when you are exhausted, stressed, discouraged, or just not motivated, it is ok to take a day off. Tomorrow when the sun shines, you can strive to take baby steps for your success. My Weight Watchers journey has been a two-year struggle. I have had days and weeks when I cannot get motivated. I’ve missed meetings. I’ve eaten things I should not eat, but what I have discovered on this exciting adventure is even when I go off the wagon,’ I pick myself up, have a sincere discussion with myself, and I restart and re-energize.

    Today is one of those days. I’ve never been one to eat at midnight, or to grab snacks. I do not have any junk food or snacks in my pantry or hidden in my home. I have fresh fruit ready always. Today, I am so tired that food or snacks does not interest me. I’ve told my husband that I am much too tired to cook dinner tonight in an uncomfortable house, so we will go out for dinner. No doubt, I will stick to my Weight Watchers program, in hopes tonight I will be able to sleep.

    Today, I have decided I must:
    *Drink plenty of water. I usually start every morning with a cold glass of water with lemon, just before I have coffee. Today, I did not do that. I suppose I was just a bit too worried about the household budget. Lessons learned – don’t worry, be happy. Life will get me by, along with the prayers and my belief in God.
    *Track my foods online and on my Iphone. I’ve been a bit negligent about that lately. Lessons learned!
    *Exercise – I strive for thirty minutes daily. On days like today, I have been one lazy, exhausted woman…and that truly is not my style. Lessons Learned!!!

    *When God gives lemons, make lemonade. Don’t focus on the negative aspects of life, and we all have them…silly moments where we dare to eat something we shouldn’t — or we binge…Focus on the positive…the encouraging compliments of others. Don’t dwell on today was a bad day. As my father shared with me throughout my life, focus on the positive, not the negative. Lessons Learned!to
    *Encourage yourself while knowing that gaining weight is a process where we put weight on over a period of time. Losing weight is the same process…it simply appears to take longer than we expected. Take weight loss one day at a time. Lessons Learned!

    Today started as a bad day for me. Hot. Uncomfortable. Difficulty breathing. Now, I am focusing on the reality that even though the morning started in a bad way, the sun is shining. My home is getting more comfortable and although I am taking the day off and doing nothing but reading, tomorrow I will jump back on the band wagon while knowing that today did not shatter me to the point that I’ve eaten everything I should not eat. Eating takes exercise, and I’m too tired to eat today!

    As for tomorrow, I will accomplish my goals. How about you? I’d love to hear your comments!

  • Losing, the Weight Watchers Way!


    Dearest Readers:

    Today is always the day — for my ‘weigh in’ with Weight Watchers. How did it go? I suppose since I am totally exhausted from lack of sleep — again — awakening at 2:00am, turning the television on, thankful that I can now record “Designing Women” and the “Golden Girls,” I watch several episodes while Father Time ever so slowly ticks, ticks, tick-tocks, the night away. Last week I did not go to the meeting. I was much too tired due to lack of sleep and another migraine headache. Let’s just say, I’m not a fun person to be around when I have a headache.

    Recognizing that if I do not get myself to the meeting I will have the tendency to slack off, I force myself to get to the meeting. This has been a good week, not just because I anticipated a good weight loss. It’s been a good week because I am working out more often, walking on the Arthur Ravenel, Jr. Bridge and I am using the treadmill. So, this week, life has been good.

    Arriving at the meeting, I hop on the scale. Minus 1.8 pounds this week, and I have finally broken that silly plateau that I was on — for seven months. Those seven months were a true test for me. Was I really determined to stick it out and continue following Weight Watchers?

    The answer is Yes! Even when I didn’t lose, or gained a bit, I kept telling myself —
    This I Do For Me!
    Even If I Gain, I’m Still Following Weight Watchers
    I Am Making New Friends – All to the Credit of Weight Watchers
    Healthy Eating, the Weight Watchers Way is The Only Way!
    Just Move – Walk…Use The Treadmill, Work Out…Simply Because — IT WORKS!

    This week, while cleaning my husband was home. As he watched me doing the household chores, he kept looking at a part of my body – only this time it wasn’t my chest. “You know,” He said, “Your butt is getting smaller!”

    I placed the dust cloth on the table. “You mean, you’ve actually noticed?”

    Coming from him that is truly a compliment. He is quick to look at other women, especially when their booties, or boobs attract his eyes.

    Turning back to the housework while my husband continued to be a couch potato, I was pleased that he noticed, a bit annoyed that he never offered to help with housework. Yes, my husband is from the old school — the Archie Bunker school, I might add!

    No wonder I am such a feminist!

    I have come to terms with the reality and pride of what I am accomplishing with Weight Watchers, and my Thursday morning meetings really start my day (and weekend) off with a bit of strength and newfound confidence! I am proud that I practice a completely new lifestyle now, and I’ve discovered that when I share with others that I am doing Weight Watchers, they are supportive. That was another reality check for me.

    When I joined Weight Watchers, I did not share the news with others. Two weeks after joining, I finally announced it to some friends, and they are always asking me how it is going…am I still doing Weight Watchers…how much have I lost…and does it really help to join Weight Watchers?

    I have had a couple of friends who joined after I did. One lost weight quickly, but then she lost interest. I haven’t asked her if she has put the weight back on. I strive to be sensitive to those issues, recalling the many, many years when I was so sensitive about my weight gains…losses…gains…haven’t we all struggled in that respect. Another friend joined Weight Watchers On Line. At first, she lost quickly, then she stopped. She confessed to me that she had given up and was cancelling her membership.

    Perhaps I persuaded her to go to a meeting. At first, she was apprehensive. “I don’t want others to know how much I weigh.”

    The meetings are confidential. No one can read the scales. You don’t have to be ashamed…we have all been there!

    She went to a meeting, and I do believe she is still going to the meetings. She lives miles away from me, so we don’t get to see each other in person.

    Today, it felt good to return to Weight Watchers after missing last week. Soon, I will tip the scales with a 40 pound weight loss. I’ll be so happy when that day arrives. I will probably meet with the leader then to decide what my goal is. I have a number dancing inside my head, but I’ll not share it — yet! Just know, for me — and perhaps for others, Weight Watchers is truly the key to losing weight and keeping it off. “Weight Watchers, because it works,” Jennifer Hudson says, and for me, I can truly relate to those words. As I watch the pounds, inches and clothing sizes decreasing, I finally gave myself a gift I haven’t shared with anyone.

    Stein Mart recently had a full-length mirror at a special price. All of my life I have wanted a full-length mirror. Each time I thought about buying one, I talked myself out of it, because I had too many bumps on my body…I didn’t want to see myself in a full-length mirror, but this time, I found the courage to buy it. One afternoon while dressing to go to karaoke, I tried a new short skirt on. I looked in the floor-length mirror. Much to my surprise, I heard a voice say, “Girl…you’re looking good!”

    Is that really me in the mirror? For the first time since losing my father in July, 1999, I felt proud of myself and the image looking in the mirror. I cannot wait to reach goal and see the image again!

    For me, Weight Watchers is my new lifestyle change. I am eating healthier now. I actually enjoy fresh fruit again, and I have learned that when I am fulfilled, I stop eating. My husband says I eat like a bird now…compared to his appetite, I suppose that is true.

    Next Thursday is the Fourth of July, Independence Day. Regardless what I eat on that date, I will enjoy every taste of the delicious foods and fruit I eat. Weight Watchers will be closed on that date, and I doubt that I will attend a different meeting. I’ve gotten to know the people at our meeting and I enjoy chatting with them. Who cares if I don’t attend a meeting next week. I’ll still be loyal to Weight Watchers.

    “Why?”

    Simple…because Weight Watchers Works, for me…and for millions! And now, I’m off to attempt a nap. If sleep fails to captivate me, I’ll just hop on the treadmill, and fight with my mini-Schnauzer, Hank. He totally believes the treadmill is his big toy.

    Enjoy your week, readers and remember — “Weight Watchers, because it works.”

  • All to the Credit of My Father


    Not that we are grown, we all know how influential our parents are to our lives and success — the good and the bad! As a child, my father influenced my life. He was the first to criticize and punish me when I misbehaved — and there were many times I misbehaved. I was a bit ‘too independent for my own britches…’ I asked too many questions. I danced to my own music, and wanted to do things, “My Way!” 

    I suppose you get the picture. Whenever my grandfather said that women belonged in the home, and I might as well give up on my dreams to sing, because I would grow up to marry a mill kid, since I lived in a mill village and that was what all the girls in Bibb City did. My reply, “I think not…I’ll never marry a mill kid!” 

    Heck – I would not date a mill kid, or a high school boy! Living in a mill village I knew, without a shadow of a doubt, I would break away from Bibb City. And I did. Yes, I was a feminist as a child!

    But — this isn’t a story about breaking away from Bibb City, or my life as a feminist. Today is a reflection on Father’s Day and how my dad guided my way. I was eight-years-old when I recall writing my first story. A teacher assigned the students to write a story about science fiction. Since we were studying the planets, I chose to write about Saturn. The title was “My Visit to Saturn.” 

    Never did I realize I had a talent for writing until my dad went to the PTA meeting. The science teacher approached my dad about my story, telling my Dad I made an A+. “No big deal,” I said…”I always make an A.”

    Months later, I came home from school. My dad greeted me at the door, carrying a magazine. “Barbara,” he said, his voice stern, his eyes bright. “Look at this magazine. Your story is in it! At the age of eight-years-old, you are a published writer!”

    I glanced at the magazine, saw my story, and tossed the magazine on the couch, cluttered with laundry for me to fold. Till this day, I do not recall what magazine published the story. I was a child…it didn’t matter to me that I was a published writer at such a young age. I had bigger dreams. I wanted to sing on stage!

    Years later, when my dad was frail and wasting away from his battle with esophageal cancer, his eyes opened as I sat next to his bed in the nursing home. “Barbara,” he said, his once boisterous voice barely a whisper. “Do you remember your first published story – “My Visit to Saturn?”

    I laughed. “Oh Dad, that was such a long time ago.”

    “Yes, it was. Do you remember it? I still have it.”

    “Yes…that was such a stupid story!”

    Dad smiled. I touched his freezing cold hand. My mind was elsewhere, as Father Time slowly ticked away for my precious father.

    A few days later, my dad died. Losing him felt as if someone had pulled my heart out of my body. How could I live? How could I breathe? How could I enjoy the sunset, and the robins without my dad?

    Somehow my life continued. In September, 1999, I decided it was time to sort through my dad’s belongings. The many scrapbooks. Diaries. Picture books. Sorting through the many pages, I opened a section that appeared to be a bit thicker than the other booklets. 

    Folded in half was a stack of notebook paper. I opened it, noticing the handwriting of a child. “My Visit to Saturn,” I read. Oh my goodness. This is my story. My handwritten story. How did Dad get this? Why did he save it? Oh my goodness. Tears streamed down my face as I read the story, Dad had treasured it. He saved it — all these years later, and I had the first story I had written, all to the credit of my father.

    I still have that story. Friends have said I should preserve it, maybe frame it. My first story – published!

    All of this is to the credit of my father – Walter Perkins. He believed in me when no one else did, and throughout his life, he still believed in me. Happy Father’s Day to a man who lead me down the path to become a writer. 

    Happy Father’s Day in Heaven, Dad — thank you for saving and preserving my first published story, “My Visit to Saturn!”

    “Stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit…
    It’s when things seem worse — you mustn’t quit!”

  • On Father’s Day


    Good morning, Readers:

    Another beautiful day filled with sunshine for Father’s Day 2013. This day is special to all who were close to dear ole Dad. As a child, I remember babysitting or cleaning, just to get a bit of money to buy my dad, and my papa, a Father’s Day gift. For both, I bought ties, since Papa wore ties to church on Sunday morning, and Dad wore ties to work nightly. Papa was a mill worker, a loom fixer at the dictatorial Bibb Manufacturing Company. Dad worked in the hotel industry as a night auditor. I respected both of them, striving to always please them.

    Over the years, as I grew older, Papa became highly critical of me, refusing to accept that I was growing up, and as a teenager, I loved rock and roll music, singing, dancing, and wearing makeup. As for my dad, he encouraged me. Yes, he had a quick hand and would swat us when we misbehaved, but he encouraged me to sing and to ‘move forward with life…don’t look back.’ Those wise words taught me lots about life. I practice those words in my daily life whenever I make mistakes, or someone hurts me. I look for the sunshine in tomorrow, not the rain that has fallen around me in the past.

    Papa died from Alzheimer’s Disease in the late 1980’s. The last time I saw him, he resided in a nursing home, strapped to a wheelchair, looking out the window at birds in the trees. Perhaps a metaphor for his younger days, when he was gentle and kind and loved to fish. On my last visit to see Papa, he did not know me. When I touched his shoulder to give him a hug, he screamed at me. He didn’t know me. I thought he had disowned me since he disapproved of me many years ago. Later, while working on research for a story about Alzheimer’s, I recognized the reality was, deep inside Papa’s eyes, he rejected me not because he did not love me…deep inside his brain, he didn’t know much of anything…His brain could not process that I was his granddaughter. Perhaps a hard thing to accept when we are young, rebellious and no longer the ‘apple of my grandfather’s eye.’ I’ve written about Papa many times. An award-winning screenplay titled, “Not My Papa,” is based on my grandfather’s life as a textile mill worker in Bibb City, Georgia.

    My dad lost his torrential battle with esophageal cancer on July 6, 1999, while I was opening the door to his room in a nursing home. Losing my dad tore my heart out for a long time. I had difficulty understanding how the sun could set, and rise again the next morning when my dad could no longer see the sun setting. “How can life continue when I no longer have my dad…I’m an orphan without him.’

    On Father’s Day, I take a moment to reflect on the significant men who helped guide me into the life I live today. My Dad…My overly-strict grandfather, and my husband. All of these men have guided me — sometimes with a controlling hand — leading me on the path to becoming the woman I am today.

    I hope they are proud of me. For most of the time, my husband, Phil, says he is proud of me, although there are times I see his eyes rolling upward, as if to say, “There she goes again!”

    Regardless – I would like to express how much I have cared for these men. As children, we watch the actions of our father, sometimes, they lead us to doing the same behaviors they performed on us. As wives, we watch our husbands, hopeful they are proud of us and will love us until the end of time.

    Life is truly a challenge. We awaken daily, hopeful of ‘making this a good day…’ And so we live, without looking back…moving forward…making the most of each day. We hope for tomorrow, only to recognize that tomorrow might bring challenges, heartbreak, or disappointments, but we must remember to follow the words of advice our dads gave us as children. “Don’t look back on life…move forward…”

    Today, I can hear my dad saying those words to me. I thank him for his wisdom and his love.

    Happy Father’s Day to our Dads…and thank you for guiding us along this path of life.

    There is a passage I say to myself almost daily. I suppose it is my anchor:

    “Stick to the fight when you’re hardest hit…
    It’s when things seem worse — you mustn’t quit!”

    Happy, Happy Father’s Day!

  • Today is Weight Watchers Weigh-In Day…


    Dearest Readers:

    Outside the windows by my desk, I see beautiful, welcoming, beaming sunshine, and bright blue clouds. My mimosa trees and oak trees are dancing with gentle strides as the mild wind brushes the branches. Another beautiful day, in beautiful Charleston, SC. Opening the back door to let my precious four-legged children inside, my body feels the unbearable heat of summertime in the City of Charleston. But wait…it isn’t summer yet! According to a weather forecast it is currently 102 degrees outside now. Thank goodness I had my heating and air system serviced a few weeks ago! The air outside is stagnant!

    Today was my weigh-in day at Weight Watchers. For over seven months I have dreaded weigh-ins. I confess, I hop on my bathroom scales daily — every morning, after awakening. This morning, my scales indicated a loss. I dressed quickly in anticipation of having a good day at Weight Watchers.

    Arriving early, I said Good Morning to several members, found my membership card in the box and stepped up to weigh. I felt confident that today would be a good day. The scales at Weight Watchers are
    ‘confidential’ — after you step on the scales, if you look down to see what the weight is, you cannot see it, nor can others. So, for those of you curious as to how weigh-ins are confidential at Weight Watchers meetings, trust me when I say they are CONFIDENTIAL! No one, with exception of the Weight Watchers receptionist assisting you will know what you weigh. In anticipation of another weekly weigh-in, curiosity was getting the best of me so I asked…’did I have a good week?’

    The receptionist smiled, folded the booklet, and said, “You’re doing great, Barbie…” She handed me my pocket-size weight record. “Six-tenths of a pound — down!” I whisper… What, you say? Only six-tenths of a pound???

    To those of you who are reading my Weight Watchers saga on a regular basis, you understand I lose ever so SLOWLY! Six-tenths of a pound is a good week…in fact, ANY WEEK that I lose is a good week. I’ve battled with a plateau for over seven months. My friends are surprised that I have ‘stuck it out…’ and If I am truthful, so am I. After suffering with a dreadful illness of acute bronchitis for three months, I began to excuse myself from Weight Watchers…I was too weak…too tired…too sleepy…or too busy for my Weight Watchers meetings… During this time, I saw the scales escalating again. I became depressed. Who cares if I lose weight, I told myself. Only to answer — Hey silly girl…You Do!

    To those who read this and are so encouraging of me while I am walking along this journey of weight loss, I must stress, it was hard to go back, after missing so many weeks…It was difficult to admit that I was so weak, I stopped caring – for a bit.

    As we, the Weight Watchers, and those who wish to find the courage and strength to join Weight Watchers, say — losing weight is truly a challenge. I have been on a yo-yo with weight loss since my childhood. My family made fun of me, telling me I was too fat to be ‘so pretty…’ They said I had a ‘pretty face, but I wasn’t pretty.’

    I let those words echo back and forth inside my mind for years…many years. I grew up thinking I was an ‘ugly duckling, or a pig,’ nevertheless, I did my best to look my best, wearing my cousin’s hand-me-downs, wearing makeup and styling my hair. Still, I felt ugly…ever so fat and ugly!

    Somehow, on March 3, 2011, I found the courage and strength to open the door to Weight Watchers. Now, I say to anyone wishing to lose weight swallow your pride, and take that first baby step to Weight Watchers. You will not hear anyone gossiping or ridiculing your decision to join. What you will find is friendship, encouragement, and pride. Even a small weight loss, such as ‘six-tenths of a pound’ is a weight loss. Weight gains? We all have them. I’ve certainly had my share, and at the moment, I must say, since I am working out regularly and moving regularly, I am losing many inches. No, I haven’t measured, but my clothes are fitting better than ever, and the sizes are getting smaller, and smaller.

    When I use the treadmill, three days weekly, or more — I have to fight with my mini-schnauzer, Hankster, the Prankster, to have my time on the treadmill. As soon as I lower the treadmill, silly little Hank barks. When the treadmill hits the carpet, Hank hops on. If I don’t turn it to an acceptable speed for him, he barks until I do! He walks on the treadmill for five to ten minutes, hops off, as if to say, “OK…it’s your turn, Mom!” Who would think a small dog would intercept a grown woman’s work out!

    Do I owe all of my slow-moving success to Weight Watchers? Yes, I say. The leaders at Weight Watchers say I owe myself the credit. “No, I owe it to Weight Watchers, the leaders, friendships and strength given to me at the meetings. Without Weight Watchers, I would’ve quit by now…”

    On this beautiful sunny day, I will share the treadmill with Hankster since it is much too hot to attempt walking the bridge today. Tomorrow — perhaps! My goal hasn’t been reached yet — all in time…all to the credit of Weight Watchers… This I truly do FOR ME!

  • My Weight Watchers Saga…


    I remember the day I made a significant decision to change my life. Thursday, March 3, 2011. The morning began like most. Fresh coffee brewing…letting the dogs outside…checking e-mail…piddling around the house…I’m certain you probably get the picture…waking up sometimes is quite a chore! I turned the TV on, watching the Today Show. Listening to it, but not really caring what the broadcast had to say.

    Since the New Year of 2011, I told myself I needed to lose more weight. Diagnosed with Type 2 Diabetes in early 2005, I reminded myself that even though I was losing, it still wasn’t enough. Jennifer Hudson sang on the TV. I listened…I simply love her voice. This time, I truly listened when she spoke about Weight Watchers and how she had lost 80 pounds.

    “Wow,” I thought. “Maybe I should join Weight Watchers again. My mind drifted back to the first time I joined Weight Watchers…how humiliated I felt when the curtain was drawn so I could be weighed. I was mortified. I did not want to go back to Weight Watchers again, to feel the humiliation of “Oh goodness…did you see how much SHE weighs?”

    I decided it was time for change…time to rejoin Weight Watchers, only this time, I would do it online.

    “No,” a voice inside spoke. “You don’t do well alone with losing weight. But…I can’t feel that humiliation again…I just can’t.” A tear slipped down my face.

    Time to research. I visited the website, Weightwatchers.com, reading all that I could about Weight Watchers and their new Points Plus program. One description echoed in my ears. “Confidential weigh-ins…” But how could that be? The last time I joined Weight Watchers, I remember them closing a beige colored curtain. The scale was on the floor, but still, people could peek through the curtains to discover ‘your little secret…how much you weigh.’

    The more I read, the more I decided…If Jennifer Hudson could do this, so could I. After all, she was a world-famous celebrity. Quickly, I dressed, put my makeup on and made the attempt to look as good as I could. The meeting was in Mt. Pleasant at 10:00 am.

    ENTERING WEIGHT WATCHERS

    At 9:15, I parked the car as far from the entrance as I could, closer to Wal-Mart than the sign of Weight Watchers. My heart was pounding. My eyes watered. I touched my trembling hands. “You can do this,” I whispered. “Remember…confidential weigh-ins…”

    Opening the door, I prayed that I would not recognize anyone. My head was low, no eye contact. Normally when I walk into a room I make an entrance. This time, I simply wanted to blend into the woodwork. A wallflower, again. Quickly I filled out the forms. Trembling, I stood in the line in anticipation of the dreadful weight check. I watched as many women got on the scales. No curtain. No privacy. My mind drifted back to the date I joined Weight Watchers, over 20 years ago. Perhaps longer. Just how could this be ‘confidential weigh-ins?’ I listened, never hearing any numbers or weight gains shared. I glanced as a woman stepped on to the small-scale. This scale reminded me of the one I had at home, in the bathroom. Digital, supposedly accurate, I waited while wondering if the weight would blink next to my feet, and if someone else would read how much I weighed.

    Stepping on the scales, I looked down. The receptionist standing behind a receptionist area smiled at me, welcoming me to Weight Watchers. I looked down, looking to read the blinking light of the scale, only there wasn’t anything blinking. “Did I break the scale?” I asked. No lights. No digital readout. Nothing.

    “No,” she smiled. “I’m the only one who can read it back here. No one else knows… It’s OK. It is confidential! Things have changed and Weight Watchers wants you to feel welcome here.”

    She handed me a small booklet. Recorded inside was my weight. No one else knew, or could read it. “Confidential weigh-ins.” I read the number. “Thank You, God,” I whispered. My secret was safe…only the receptionist and I knew the number, and she appeared sympathetic…understanding. I felt as if I could trust her!

    I inhaled. Exhaled. I sat down — in the back row. I did not want to connect eye sight with anyone. I did not want anyone to recognize me.

    I inhaled and exhaled again. My fingers continued to shake. My heart palpitated. Never did anyone inquire as to what I weighed. No one asked me if I was new. I began to realize that everyone in this crowded room was a “Weight Watcher.”

    “It’s OK,” I said to myself. “Everyone here has walked in the same shoes…You’ve made the right decision.”

    Moments later, a friendly, attractive woman with beautiful red hair and a pleasant and warm personality walked towards the front of the room. She stopped by me for a moment. “What’s your first name?” She asked.

    I wanted to crawl through the woodwork. “Barbie,” I whispered. She wrote my name on a name tag, handing it to me. I placed it on my shirt, still looking at my feet.

    She smiled and walked to the front of the room.

    Shouting so all could hear, she said. “Welcome to Weight Watchers. My name is Kathy. I’m your leader!”

    Two years later, I still fight with losing weight. I have learned to apply positive feedback. Instead of thinking “But I’ve only lost 35 pounds…in two years…” I tell myself, “Hey dummmy…just think of where the scales would tip IF you hadn’t joined Weight Watchers and made a great lifestyle change. Think of the clothes you could not wear…because they were too little…all of those gorgeous cocktail dresses that you had to give away…simply because they were too big! No doubt my Goodwill store appreciates me. Weight Watchers has taught me not to save those ‘big clothes…’ and I donate them to charity, instead.

    I hate to even think where those scales would be now, but they would steadily be creeping up, instead of down. Now, on Thursdays, I sit with a great group of women…all who have walked in my shoes…all who have lost only “.02 of a pound weekly…for many weeks…” We encourage each other by reminding ourselves that we are still losing…even when we only lose .02! I’ve called us the “Two tenths club!”

    Some of the nicest words I have heard in a long, long time are “Welcome to Weight Watchers,” and Kathy’s affectionate, happy words of ‘HE-LLLL-O,” at every meeting.

    Yes, I have joined Weight Watchers…and my journey has been two years long, but during that time I have achieved many accomplishments…not simply weight loss, weight gain…and back and forth… I am able to walk on the Arthur Ravenel, Jr. Bridge in Charleston — with an extremely painful arthritic knee that doesn’t ache as much after losing 35 pounds! AND — I have accomplished walking on the treadmill for 30-40 minutes daily! Not bad for someone with asthma!

    Like the slogan says, “Weight Watchers…because it works!”

    I am a believer now. Every Thursday I have a group of encouraging friends at the meetings. No longer do I hold my head down. I smile. Head held high and I share my stories…Weight Watchers…because it WORKS!!!

    Goodbye, Wallflower!

  • Happy Easter


    Sunday, March 31, 2013

    Dearest Readers:

    Today is Easter, so as the tradition goes, I would like to wish all of you a most Happy Easter. The religious holiday of Easter is early this year. Normally, I look for it after the warm spring holidays begin. For this year, in the Holy City of Charleston, SC, we haven’t had many warm days this month. Most days, the mornings were chilly where you needed to wear a sweater or jacket in the mornings, and sometimes, throughout the day. Our spring fling hasn’t begun. This morning, I awaken to 61 degrees outside. Hello Spring Time! Pouring a fresh cup of coffee, just to awaken, I saw the morning sunshine in the midst of dark clouds. The weather forecast for today is rain, and now, as I look outside my windows while writing this, I see only gray clouds, darkness, and I believe I hear raindrops. But it’s Easter, you say…the day for me to wear my Easter bonnet and “Sunday best” just for Easter….

    Easter is the Christian celebration of the resurrection of Christ. Christians believe (and I am definitely a Christian) that Jesus was crucified for our sins. Burying his body in a large cave, a boulder blocked the entrance. According to traditional stories in the Bible, and beyond, on Sunday the entrance to Jesus’ gravesite was open and “Jesus has risen!” was discovered by a few women, including the Virgin Mary.

    As a child, I was taught to celebrate Easter, like most children are taught. Living in a mill village for many of those years, my family did not have the money to splurge on Easter bonnets, frilly dresses, and pumps and Easter baskets. Our grandparents catered to the four girls in my family by buying us these pretty items. So, on Easter Sunday, I made certain I was dressed to impress in my Easter dress. I’ve always enjoyed dressing lacy and glitzy, so Easter Sunday was a day I wore my new dress until the evening. Colorful bows, matching my outfit were worn in my hair. I wanted to shine! Easter Sunday, my family went to church and if my memory is correct, we celebrated an Easter feast at the fellowship hall of Beallwood Assembly of God Church. After we ate, the Easter Egg Hunt began. I did not wish to get myself dirty, so instead of looking for Easter eggs, I spent time with the boys. Imagine that!

    Today, I will have a quiet Easter with my husband and neighbors. Since 2010, there has been a new tradition in our neighborhood with one of our greatest neighbors inviting us to an Easter feast with the neighbors. I look forward to seeing all of them again, enjoying a quiet, relaxing Easter day celebration, while remembering why the world celebrates Easter.

    To all of you reading this, I hope your Easter is filled with the traditions of the season – the belief in Christianity, the Resurrection of Christ, the symbolism of life and death and the passing into a new divine life. As for traditions, may you enjoy the traditions you practice with your family and friends. May you feast on lamb, baked ham, and all the delicious foods of Easter. May your children find the Easter eggs while enjoying all the goodies the Easter bunny gave them. Still, I reflect on the Easter holidays I celebrated with my grandparents and the traditions they instilled upon us, their bratty, spoiled granddaughters. My grandmother truly believed in spoiling us, while teaching us about religion and the power of faith. Grammy taught me wisely, as I watched her actions. My belief in the power of prayer is a credit to her and watching her bowing at her knees, while looking up into the sky as she folded her hands and prayed for God to help her with the burdens in her life. Sometimes, I listened to her praying, hiding behind a curtain so she could not see, or hear me. Once, she caught me. When she asked why I was hiding I looked up at her, tears dripping down my face.

    “Grammy,” I said…”I was listening to you praying. I wanted to know why you are so sad and praying all the time.”

    “I have a burden. God listens to it. He will help me with the burdens I have.”

    Now older and wiser, I understand a bit about her burdens. Our family life was not a happy time. Now, as I look back, I feel blessed that I had such a significant role model within the hands, faith and body of my precious grandmother. She instilled in me the power of prayer, and the belief that God is always listening to us, hearing our burdens, while at times, He may test us, just to see IF we still believe.

    On Easter Sunday 2013, I will say, I still believe. I have faith. I have strength. During my lifetime, God has guided me during times of trouble, and during times of sheer faith. I hope your Easter Sunday will be blessed. Please take a moment to look up into the skyline, even if it is laced with gray clouds and raindrops. Look at it this way. The raindrops are washing the blanket of pollen away, along with the cleansing of cobwebs from our minds. Today, Easter Sunday, is the day to believe that there is a new day blooming inside of us. A new chapter, or a new journey in our lives may start today. Have your faith. Dress your finest, share those beautifully decorated Easter eggs with your children and loved ones while knowing Easter Sunday is truly symbolic — a new beginning, on a new horizon! Happy Easter!

  • Walking At An Advanced Level While Working Thru My Fears – Arthur Ravenel, Jr. Bridge


    Today, I tackled the Arthur Ravenel, Jr. Bridge once again. My goal for each week is to walk it three times weekly. To those of you who do not know, “The bicycle and pedestrian lane is 2.7 miles long (14,400 feet), measuring from
    Patriots Point Road to East Bay Street. Measuring only the part that is on the bridge structure, the walkway is 2.4 miles long (12,750 feet). Most of the bridge is limited to a 4.1% maximum slope. On the Charleston side of the
    main span, the long approach is a 1.8% slope. On the Mount Pleasant side, there is a section three tenths of a mile long that has a 5.6% slope.” http://www.cooperriverbridge.org/bike.shtml

    The bridge opened in 2005. Almost every time I have driven across this bridge I have always said to myself, “One day, I’m going to walk that bridge…” Thanks to Weight Watchers and the new goals I have established, I am achieving that goal. I must say, as I approach the beginning of the bridge, I look ahead, noticing the steep incline. “Focus,” I tell myself. “You can do this.” There is an inner-voice inside of me saying, “Don’t you hear the traffic. Don’t you remember how frightened you are of busy roads, cars rushing by and so much traffic.” I struggle to push that inner-voice aside…not to listen to her…to be stronger…more determined…and before I know it, I continue the walk. My first goal is the first tower from Patriots Point. Accomplishing that goal, I rest…breathing in…breathing out…remembering how I must breathe so I do not have an asthma attack.

    I am proud of myself for accomplishing the bridge walk. As a child, resting inside an oxygen tent, fighting another episode of asthma in the hospital, I never thought I could accomplish this task. Doctors had said that I would never be active like other children, simply because asthma had left me weak. The steep incline intimidated me at first, but I wanted to prove to myself that I can do this. Maybe I cannot run like the joggers who pass by me, but I can achieve my goals, and I have.

    Today, while walking up the first incline, I noticed a woman struggling. She stopped. As I passed by her, I turned back. “Are you Okay?” Her breathing was raspy. She held on to the rail, looking down.

    “I’m afraid of heights… I can’t do this. I told my daughter I couldn’t and I’m scared.”

    “Where’s your daughter?”

    “Up there ahead of us.”

    I touched her. “It’s okay. I have a fear of traffic. I was hit by a car when I was nine-years-old. I’m horrified that a car may jump the ramp and hit me…but I can’t focus on that. I have to believe in the power of positive thinking, and I must have faith that I can do this walk.”

    The woman gave me a puzzled look. “When you were hit, were you injured?”

    “Definitely. The driver was a hit and run. He was a teenager. He was drunk, but when he noticed someone was writing notes about the accident, he pulled over. I guess he knew he would be caught, so he stopped then. I had a severe concussion and my brain was swollen. The doctors and police officers said I should’ve been killed…but look at me now…Here I am walking the bridge. If I can do this with my fears, so can you.”

    The woman released her clutched hand from the rail. “Ok,” she said. “How do you know I can do this…that I can work past my fears…?”

    “I have faith…God will guide you.”

    “You don’t know me…”

    “I have faith.”

    I started my approach again. The woman followed me. When I topped the second tower, I saw her again, walking with her daughter. She stopped to hug me.

    “Thank you,” she said. “I did it! I wouldn’t have done it without you.”

    Her daughter smiled, said thank you and together, they turned to walk down the bridge.

    Funny. Today was my day just to walk the bridge, only today was a new day for me to smile at someone, share a bit of courage, and a lot of faith. Every day of my life, I attempt to share a bit of kindness to others. Never did I think I would do that on the towers of the Arthur Ravenel, Jr. Bridge.

    Walking down the bridge, I felt a bit wiser…a bit stronger…a bit happier with who I am. I smile at people as I pass them on the bridge. Most of them are preoccupied with cell phones, Ipods and a blank look on their faces. Today, I am thankful that although my Blackberry is inside my pocket, my Ipod is at home and I am focused on the challenge of walking the bridge…building a bridge to my health, happiness and weight loss. Much of that I give credit to Weight Watchers, but today, I give credit to the kindness of a stranger who was struggling to work past her fear…and she did it…along with me!